.. to all of you, out there, in the dark ..

.. you may remember this brilliant line from the closing scene of Sunset Boulevard after Norma traipses down the staircase to the absolute horror of the press and police lined up to whisk her away for murder .. she pauses at the bottom, turns to the camera and says, "I can't go on with the scene. I'm too overcome," and proceeds to thank everyone, including us sitting in abject awe of this flawless fruit loop whose dreams have finally come true ..

well, much as I seek to emulate the incomparable Miss Desmond, I wanted to give thanks to all of you whose kind words of encouragement have kept me going with this blog .. you realize, I am sure, that this is my in-office therapy, and you are my unpaid therapist, reading in anyonymous silence as I go on, and onnn, and onnnnnn about me, ME, Norma Desmond

(really, see the film. otherwise we'll have nothing to talk about)

it is a wonderous thing to take a pause from my Entourage, to halt the endless missives of effortless cheer that sounds something like "splendid faabulous fantastic wonderful how divine darling thank you" so that I can blather about any damn thing I like .. you realize, the beautiful view of the Brooklyn Bridge from the padded walls of my cell do a touch to keep the peace, but it is this blog that truly maintains my sanity ..

okay, maybe not .. it's probably the lack of sugar and caffeine and alcohol and nicotine and weed and meat and late nights and long parties and stiletto heels and tailored clothing and just about every thing people in civilized society do to distract themselves from their lives that is what is keeping me on even keel .. because without distractions I am apt to find things like writing a blog to be rather relaxing amidst my otherwise hectic schedule ..

so tell your friends, send me love letters, reinforce this exercise in narcissism because you know I love it .. I mean you ~did~ just read my last entry about my weakness for worship didn't you .. Yes, I thought so ..